Cooking with KG: the Celtics' Kevin Garnett sounds off on team chemistry

History has shown that a lockout shortened season produces inferior quality basketball. Shorter training camps, lack of a pre season, less time between games, and more injuries are all factors that detract from the game, as the Celtics' Kevin Garnett addressed through use of a stomach churning metaphor:

"Timing is everything. Chemistry is something that you don't just throw in the frying pan and mix it up with another something, then throw it on top of something, then fry it up and put it in a tortilla and put in a microwave, heat it up and give it to you and expect it to taste good. You know? For those of you who can cook, y'all know what I'm talking about. If y'all can't cook, this doesn't concern you."

Garnett is a perennial first team all defensive player, future first ballot a hall of famer, and mufti-millionaire, but from the sound of it either KG spends some of those millions employing a personal chef or dinner at his house is really interesting. Maybe while he's at it, Garnett can find a recipe for a 0-3 Celtics team still starving for its first victory.

 

                                                      video courtesy of NESN.com

These boots are made for walking

Forget UGGs, the clear fashion trend this winter is the walking boot popularized by countless NFL players fashionistas hobbled by various leg and foot injuries. In the Bay Area alone, Raiders players Darren McFadden, Jacoby Ford, and Denarius Moore, as well as the Niners' Michael Crabtree have all sported the boot at some point during the season.

Perhaps I'm out of touch with the wonders of modern sports medicine, but I feel like the term walking boot wasn't even en vogue in the NFL until recently. Gone are the days of athletic tape, so you better sell your stock in ACE bandage because in today's NFL it seems like any player that suffers an injury ends up in a walking boot in hopes of a speedier recovery. The things are so wildly popular, they have even become collectibles and memorabilia (see inset).
 

Michael Crabtree's walking boot w/ 49er team autographs

In fact, the emergence of the walking boot may have coincided with the ever popular sports injury known as the "high ankle sprain." I rolled my ankle plenty of times playing basketball, never was I aware that my ankle could travel up my leg. This also begs the question, if you have cankles can you get a high ankle sprain? Are NFL linemen immune to such injuries? With the number of star caliber players sporting this specialty footwear over the years, from Brady to Roethlisberger to Adrian Peterson, you'd think those boots were made from molded plastic cooled by water from the fountain of youth.

However, the use of the boot is not without some controversy, as a 2009 article from Medical News Today points out:

"Thus we recommend the use of a 10-day below knee cast for the management of severe ankle sprains, or alternatively, an Aircast brace. Neither tubular compression bandage nor the Bledsoe boot are recommended."

The findings suggest that the walking boot, or Bledsoe boot as it's called in the study, may not be the best choice, and I'm inclined to agree if not for the simple fact that the boot shares its namesake with Drew Bledsoe, a quarterback who forever lost his starting job to Tom Brady after getting injured. If that's not bad juju, then I don't know what is.

If you ask me, science needs to take things a step further and create a full body boot to help players recover more quickly. Nintendo has already presented the prototype with its popular Super Mario Bros. franchise.

Mario's status for Week 13 is questionable

Or maybe, instead of having players wear a walking boot, have them drink from Das Boot. Sure the ligaments and tendons won't mend faster, but at least the tremendous amounts of beer will have an analgesic effect for the pain, and you know midweek press conferences will be A LOT more entertaining.

Black Friday deal of the century: NBA lockout over

Various media outlets are reporting that the NBA and the Players Association have reached a tentative deal ending the lockout. It appears there won't be coal in the stockings of NBA fans this year, as the agreement has the season slated to start on Christmas day.

The news comes as a great relief to players, owners, and fans alike, with the exception of Kris Humphries who will undoubtedly be subjected to heckling over his failed marriage that broke down quicker than Monta Ellis splitting a double team, and Cleveland Cavalier fans who will have to endure an awful basketball team on top of a harsh Ohio winter.

The VickRib is back, get it while supplies last!

The news out of Philadelphia keeps getting worse as Michael Vick's availability for Sunday's key divisional matchup versus the Giants remains uncertain. Head coach Andy Reid, who looks to have thrown back a few gazillion McRibs in his day informed the media Vick suffered two broken ribs on the second play from scrimmage in last week's surprising loss to the lowly Arizona Cardinals. Vick himself didn't use the injury as an excuse, no athlete would, but the possibility remains that Reid used the injury as an explanation for Vick's errant throws throughout last week's game. Of course benching one of Vick's most explosive weapons in Desean Jackson for missing a team meeting didn't help matters, but dishing out discipline is easier when you're at home and projected to crush your opponent (oops).

Vick's decision to play through the pain played out like a failed version of Tony Romo's Week 2 heroics versus the San Francisco 49ers, in which the Texas gunslinger rallied his team to a 4th quarter comeback and subsequent overtime win. Unfortunately for Vick the location of the injury is pretty much where the similarities end, as the Cowboys appear to be playoff bound while the Eagles have better odds of finding actual beef in a Mickey D's cheeseburger than making any noise this season. It's hard to fault Vick's decision as it was a real catch-22 situation. If the Eagles had won this would be a non issue, as it stands they lost and at least you can say Vick is gritty, but sitting out would have been another matter. We all saw how well it worked for Jay Cutler last year in the playoffs. Funny how winning erases the bad taste in peoples' mouths, like guzzling a coke after plowing through a 20 piece McNugget meal. So where do you stand on Vick's decision to stay in the game?

Source: ESPN

The Kardashian Effect

By now you've probably heard that Kim Kardashian and NBA star role player Kris Humphries have filed for divorce. The sudden news stunned and saddened millions of zero Americans around the country, and has spawned conjecture and criticism from the media that Kim was in it solely for the money as she earned $18 million for the rights to broadcast her wedding. As easy as it is to kick someone while they're down, we should instead focus on Kim's positive contributions to society in something Fox Sports has termed The Kardashian Effect:   

The free-agent forward [Humphries] had the best statistical season of his NBA career during the time he dated Kardashian, posting career highs in points per game (10), rebounds per game (10.4), assists per game (1.1), blocks per game (1.1), field goal percentage (.527) and minutes per game (27.9).

Kim K's mysterious rejuvenating qualities don't end at Humphries either, as NFL players Reggie Bush and Miles Austin also reaped the benefits:

Bush, who dated Kardashian on-and-off from 2007 through 2010, won a Super Bowl with the New Orleans Saints while with her.

And then there's Cowboys' receiver Miles Austin, whose two week roll in the hay with Kim K. yielded a substantial payout:

At the tail end of their relationship Austin signed a six-year, $54 million contract extension with the Cowboys.

In addition to the big payday, Austin caught 20 passes for 288 yards and a touchdown during the two regular season games that coincided with their relationship.

In the spirit of all the positive mojo gained from the Kardashian Effect, THMG presents 4 athletes/sports personalities that need to date Kim Kardashian:

Albert Haynesworth

This ex-pat's short stint on the waiver wire is more a sign of things to come than an aberration. Al and Kim have more in common than you think, both are petulant and have a wide base, but I'd give Kim the edge when it comes to stopping the run (i.e. tackling Reggie Bush).

David Stern

Facing the prospect of no pro basketball till after Christmas, the best way to expedite the negotiations would be to argue less about BRI and instead welcome a little KIM into the equation.

Fresno Pacific University guard Lenny Young

After being dismissed from the basketball team for a violation of team standards, Young went on a bender that Y! Sports  described as a "naked rampage." 3 taser strikes, 1 bite from a police dog, and 1 failed carjacking attempt on a police cruiser later, the stark naked player was finally subdued. They say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, and no one has parlayed being naked into fame quite like Kim Kardashian.

Peyton Manning / the Indianapolis Colts

This one's a no brainer, Manning needs the vertebrae in his neck to fuse, and Kim often appears confused, it's a match made in heaven.

Source Fox sports via friend of THMG, RajBaj

Jumbo Joe has a jumbo mouth

San Jose Sharks captain Joe Thornton drew criticism for recent comments he made toward the New York Rangers following Monday's 2-5 loss at MSG. Although the Sharks came up short during the game, Thornton unleashed some offense in his post game remarks.

"They were probably the softest team we played on the trip," Thornton said. "We should have had these two points."

Thornton went on to express his desire to dip the Rangers in chocolate or perhaps dress them up with some rainbow sprinkles.

Not to be outdone, the New York Rangers fired back, albeit from an unlikely source. If you're Joe Thornton you know you've given a team some prime-time bulletin board material when their coach tells you to STFU on national television.

  

video courtesy of Versus via Hockeywebcast

Perhaps Thornton's comments were meant to motivate the Sharks (it wouldn't be the first time a team leader has used the media to call out his team), or perhaps the comments were more introspective, as the Sharks and even Thornton himself have been criticized for soft play or for being a finesse team in prior years. Whatever the case may be, expect fireworks the next time these two teams square off.

Occupy New York (Jets)

Y! Sports is reporting that 3-time Pro Bowl signal caller Mark Brunell is currently mired in $50 million worth of debt due to a string of bad investments. The news does not shock Ken Ruettgers, former player and current head of gamesover.org, a group dedicated to helping former players transition into everyday life upon leaving the game.

"It's something like 78 percent of former NFL players, two years after their last game, are either bankrupt, divorced, or unemployed," Ruettgers told WAWS-TV in Jacksonville.

At this time it is unknown when Brunell, the former Jaguars star and current Jets backup, will join the tent city on Wall Street, but given the inconsistent nature of the Jets offense a good guess would be by the end of the regular season on January 1st.

Brunell himself could not be reached for comment, but looked inexplicably excited and happy despite his predicament. One can only speculate that his font-like handwriting or love of giant sheets of binder paper are helping ease the pain of financial ruin.

Lamar Odom wins Halloween

I can say with 99.9% certainty that by the time tonight is over, Lamar Odom will have consumed more candy than your sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, and cousins combined. All this time I thought Odom disappeared in the 4th quarter of games because he was soft and disinterested, when actually it's just a sugar crash. What do you think is worth more, Lamar and Khloe's prenup or his dental bill?

video courtesy of ESPN

Man vs. Food to Al Harrington: Don't quit your day job

Loyal fans, team employees, and now Al Harrington's heart and arteries are just a few entries on the growing list of casualties claimed by the NBA lockout. Last weekend the Nuggets forward attempted and subsequently failed the Bugsy Challenge at the Flamingo Hilton in Las Vegas. Harrington, who averaged 10.5 PPG and 4.6 RPG for Denver last season, was obviously looking to boost his career LDL numbers by devouring this humongous hunk of hamburger heaven.

From Haute Living via Balls Don't Lie:

a burger with six one-third-pound burger patties, six types of cheese (American, cheddar, pepper jack, fresh house-made mozzarella, Swiss and panko-crusted deep-fried provolone), chorizo, sautéed mushrooms, black and tan onion rings, three strips of applewood smoked bacon, three strips of cayenne peppered bacon and a fried egg, all oozing with Burger Joint's special pink peppercorn aioli. This massive burger is accompanied by a cast iron skillet packed with two whole potatoes cut in wedges and deep fried, then smothered in cheddar cheese sauce, three-cheese blend, crumbled bacon, sliced green onions and topped with two strips of cayenne peppered bacon.

Although an isolated event, Harrington's weekend of gluttony sheds light on the fact that during a lockout players are largely left to their own devices in the absence of a training camp or structured off season workouts. The injury-laden, inferior basketball played during the lockout shortened season of '98-'99 is a prime example of what may amount to a lost '11-'12 season for a league that started to regain some national traction over the past few years.

Harrington's epic fail is somewhat surprising since it's no secret the man's got a big mouth as evidenced by the amount of trash he talks during a game. Although the Nuggets forward could not finish the massive burger in the allotted 45 minutes, Harrington can proudly declare that he's better than Lebron James (at hamburger eating), because had Lebron attempted a similar feat, he would have undoubtedly choked during the last 5 minutes.

T.O.'s open workout well attended by chirping crickets and tumbleweeds

Free agent wideout Terrell Owens, fresh off a six month stint of rehab for a torn ACL, held an open workout today for the press and NFL scouts in hopes of landing a new contract with a team. Unfortunately for T.O., his workout, which was promoted by the NFL Network and Owens' agent Drew Rosenhaus, generated the same amount of interest as when I'm at the gym doing dumbbell curls near the pilates class (minus their laughing or my subsequent sobbing).

The showcase was held at Calabasas High School, but the 37 year old veteran may have been better served staging his audition on the croquette lawn at the local senior center as Owens lacked any semblance of the burst necessary to create separation on his routes.

Undaunted by the fact that none of the 32 NFL teams sent reps to the training session, Owens remained confident in stating, "I have faith I'll land on my feet."

I'm all for the guy looking at the situation with the glass half full, but in this case it appears that the glass isn't even on the table any longer. It's a fairly telling sign when your VH1 reality show garners more interest than your ability to catch a football, and the sooner Owens sees the writing on the wall, the sooner he can transition into a cushy commentator gig. With his flash and charisma, Owens would be a natural fit alongside the likes of Keyshawn Johnson or Deion Sanders.
 
Information from the Associated Press was used in this report

Raiders to Palmer: Mastery of Krebs Cycle required for Sunday start

Raiders offensive coordinator Al Saunders shocked the sports world yesterday morning during an interview on 610 Sports Radio Kansas City when he stated newly acquired quarterback Carson Palmer would start Sunday's contest against the Chiefs "as long as he's breathing."

Palmer, eager to impress his new teammates and Bay Area fan-base, took his coordinator's words to heart and began studying the nuances of cellular respiration from a biology textbook he once saw some Asian students carrying around the USC campus.

When asked how his assimilation to a new team and playbook were going, Palmer responded, "I've got a pretty firm grasp on where the ball needs to go when coach calls Slant Left 787 check swing, check right, but I can't seem to remember that the decarboxylation of oxalosuccinate is the rate limiting step of the Krebs Cycle."

With each passing day it's becoming clear that Palmer will get the start Sunday as he continues to take first team reps and breathe at a very efficient rate, generating an impressive 36 ATP along the way.

In other Raiders' news, the Kyle Boller era in Oakland has ended before it ever got started, and former starter Jason Campbell has begun rehabbing a broken heart clavicle.

Will Smith becomes part owner of the 76ers, poised to sign Uncle Phil

ESPN is reporting today that the Philadelphia 76ers have been sold to a new ownership group in which actor turned rapper turned actor turned rapper turned actor Will Smith has a minority stake. The announcement makes Smith the latest in a list of musicians to hold partial ownership of NBA franchises, with artists such as Usher (Cavaliers) and Jay-Z (Nets) having crossed over in the past. 

Following the press conference, Smith wasted no time excersing his 0.000001% control over the team by announcing his intent to beef up the team's front-line by signing Philip Banks to a 10-day contract pending the end of the NBA lockout.

"Uncle Phil gives us another weapon on the pick and roll, ha-ha, Big Willie style," Smith added while flashing a goofy smile.

Although it is unclear if Uncle Phil's signing will do much to bolster the team's interior defense or rebounding, his demonstrative screaming and gruff parenting style will undoubtedly charm Sixers fans and viewers alike.

Niners tame Lions as Harbaugh and Schwartz engage in Mortal Kombat

The San Francisco 49ers (5-1) notched yet another come from behind road win on Sunday, and in the process dealt the Detroit Lions (5-1) their first loss of the season with a 25-19 victory at a raucous Ford Field. Alex Smith put the Niners ahead for good with just 1:51 remaining in the 4th quarter when he hooked up with Delanie Walker for a 6 yard score on a dramatic 4th and Goal situation. Smith's TD to Walker capped an impressive stretch going back to the second quarter where the Niners rallied from down 0-10 to outscore the Lions 25-9 in the final 3 frames.

The most impressive part of the win is the way that the 49ers dominated the Lions in the trenches, playing a smash mouth style of football personified by their fiery coach Jim Harbaugh. Make no mistake about it, this is not the "physical with an F," run into a wall repeatedly and punt style that was the trademark of the Mike Singletary era. This is a smart kind of dominance, physical toughness tempered by cerebral calculation.

You hear talk across the Bay from Raider's coach Hue Jackson about wanting to create a bully in Oakland, well Harbaugh's Niners are also a bully, but they're a bully that will beat you up just to steal and finish your algebra homework because it's fun. The Niners aren't physical with an F, hell they aren't even physical with a PH, the Niners are physical with a PhD.

Of course it's easy to play smash mouth football when you believe your coach is willing to literally smash the opposing coach in the mouth, as was evidenced in the post game "handshake" between Harbaugh and Lions' coach Jim Schwartz. Harbaugh's post game mea culpa claimed exuberance leading up to a firm handshake, while Schwartz claimed he felt dissed and ignored. Deliberate or not, you can judge for yourself after watching the video below. Anyone familiar with Jim Harbaugh's track record knows he's a passionate guy, but he's also shrewd as they come, and loves his guys to play with an edge harboring an "us against the world" mentality. So after the fines, sound bytes, and pomp and circumstance, what remains is a Niners team sitting atop the NFC West at 5-1, and a Niners coach that just stole Jim Schwartz's homework.

video courtesy of Sports Grid

Junk food, booze, video games, and porn... is it too late to learn to thow a curveball?

The reasons behind the Boston Red Sox's historic September collapse are becoming clearer as the Boston Globe published an article describing a clubhouse devoid of leadership, motivation, or accountability. The most egregious offenders appear to be starting pitchers Josh Beckett, Jon Lester, and John Lackey, who as the days and losses and pounds piled on, appeared more like they were rushing a fraternity than pitching for an AL pennant:

Instead, Boston’s three elite starters went soft, their pitching as anemic as their work ethic. The indifference of Beckett, Lester, and Lackey in a time of crisis can be seen in what team sources say became their habit of drinking beer, eating fast-food fried chicken, and playing video games in the clubhouse during games while their teammates tried to salvage a once-promising season.

Sources said Beckett, Lester, and Lackey, who were joined at times by Buchholz, began the practice late in 2010. The pitchers not only continued the routine this year, sources said, but they joined a number of teammates in cutting back on their exercise regimens despite appeals from the team’s strength and conditioning coach Dave Page.

Now I'm no expert, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express once, and I'm guessing it's pretty tough to strikeout a major league hitter if all you can think about are miniature hamburgers when your catcher is calling for a slider.

Whatever someone wants to do in their free time is their own business, but if you're getting paid $17 million a year to play once every five days, you probably should be present in the dugout and cheering for your teammates during the game. Last time I checked it's kind of hard to clap when you've got an XBOX 360 controller in one hand, and a piece of the colonel's extra tasty crispy in the other. Then again, if the Red Sox are playing the Yankees, and Papelbon is pitching, the game is likely to last 5 days until your next start, so I guess there are exceptions to every rule.

Not to be outdone, former major league pitcher and current MLB Network analyst Al Leiter appeared on the Dan Patrick show today, and practically admitted to the existence of a dedicated porn room at the Mets' old Shea Stadium:

Gives new meaning to the saying, "If you build it, they will come."

49ers sign Brett Swain, adding depth at receiver, special teams, and grunge metal bassist

Matt Maiocco at CSNBayArea.com is reporting that the San Francisco Forty Niners have signed former Packer wideout, special teams player, and "high motor guy" Brett Swain to a one year deal. The move comes after receiver Josh Morgan underwent what is likely to be season ending surgery for a leg fracture he sustained during last Sunday's romp over the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

Swain logged a total of 6 catches for 72 yards all of last season for Green Bay, but appeared in all sixteen games for the Packers as a cog on their special teams unit.

A source close to the Niners (i.e. me sitting 3" from my TV on Sundays) was quoted as saying that "Swain was able to distinguish himself at yesterday's tryout from veteran wideouts like T.J. Houshmandzadeh, Chris Chambers and Brian Finneran by demonstrating a sense of angst and social disenchantment through sludgy and distorted guitar riffs."

One can only hope that Swain's melancholy yearning for freedom may help him find soft spots in zone coverages. He will likely enter Sunday's matchup against the Lions as SF's 4th wide receiver.

NBA cancels first 2 weeks of season, sales of Rosetta Stone skyrocket

In a move that is surprising only to people who believe in unicorns, Santa Claus, and the inherent good of mankind, NBA commissioner David Stern announced the cancellation of the first two weeks of the regular season.

Stern stated that both sides are "very far apart on virtually all issues. ... We just have a gulf that separates us."

The move means that basketball won't be played until after November 14th at the earliest, but more importantly leaves millions of American basketball fans scrambling to gain fluency in Italian, Turkish, Chinese, and Russian to follow their favorite NBA players in Europe and Asia (see ESPN's guide to overseas player movement). As a service to readers, THMG has included a handy guide of useful phrases to get you through the harsh Russian winter:

Hand down, man down!
Italian: tramandare uomo a terra!
Turkish: adam aşağı elini aşağı!
Russian: руку человека вниз!
Chinese: 上下人的手下來！

Mama, there goes that man! 
Italian: Mamma, ci dice che uomo!
Turkish: Mama, bu adam oraya gider!
Russian: Мама, что там идет человек!
Chinese: 媽媽，有雲，人！

I thought flopping was encouraged in this country?
Italian: Ho pensato flopping stato incoraggiato in questo paese?
Turkish:  Flopping bu ülkede teşvik edildi düşündünüz mü?
Russian: Я думал, на флопе было предложено в этой стране?
Chinese: 我想假摔是在這個國家的鼓勵？ 

Excuse me, where may I park my diamond encrusted Bentley?  
Italian: Mi scusi, dove posso parcheggiare la mia Bentley tempestato di diamanti?
Turkish: Affedersiniz, benim elmas encrusted Bentley nereye park edebilirsiniz?
Russian: Извините меня, где я могу оставить свой золота инкрустирован Bentley?
Chinese:  對不起，我的公園我的鑲滿鑽石賓利的？

What is the quickest way to get to Amsterdam? 
Russian: Qual è il modo più rapido per arrivare a Amsterdam?
Turkish: Amsterdam almak için en hızlı yolu nedir?
Russian: Какой самый быстрый способ добраться до Амстердама?
Chinese: 什麼是最快的方式得到阿姆斯特丹？ 
 
  

The buc stops here: Niners roll Tampa 48-3

The 49ers turned in their most complete effort of the young season this afternoon in a 48-3 throttling of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Candlestick Park. The offense hit on all cylinders, paced by 2 TDs from all-pro tight end Vernon Davis. Frank Gore helped break the will of the Tampa Defense scoring a TD and logging his second consecutive 100+ yd rushing game. Gore's recent success has helped ease some concern about the Niners' nonexistent rushing attack early on in the season, a change which seems to have coincided with Adam Snyder's insertion into the starting lineup at right guard. Niners QB, Alex Smith, managed the game with the ruthless efficiency of an Asian accountant, going 11/19 for 170 yds and 3 scores. The same could not be said for Bucs QB, Josh Freeman, who at times seemed confused by San Francisco's blitz packages and zone coverages, even surrendering a pick-six to Carlos Rogers early in the second quarter.

The win is significant for the 49ers on many fronts, keeping them two games ahead of division rival Seattle, avenging last season's shutout loss to the Bucs, and validating last week's come from behind victory over the dream nightmare team Philadelphia Eagles.

Official press release on the passing of Al Davis

The Passing of Al Davis

Posted Oct 8, 2011

JULY 4, 1929 – OCTOBER 8, 2011

The Oakland Raiders are deeply saddened by the passing of Al Davis. Al Davis was unique – a maverick, a giant among giants, a true legend among legends, the brightest star among stars, a hero, a mentor, a friend.
Al Davis was the only person in professional football history to have been a scout, assistant coach, head coach, general manager, commissioner and owner.
He was an innovator, a pioneer with a deep love and passion for the game of football.  His contributions to the game are innumerable and his legacy will endure forever through generations of players, coaches, administrators and fans.
Al Davis was a champion of diversity who maintained the courage of his convictions. His passion for the game we all love is best exemplified by his famous phrase, “COMMITMENT TO EXCELLENCE.”
The fire that burns brightest in the Raider organization, “THE WILL TO WIN,” will continue to blaze through the legacy of the great Al Davis.

Source: http://www.raiders.com/

Al Davis dead at 82

USA Today is reporting that iconic Oakland Raiders owner Al Davis has passed away at the age of 82. Check back at THMG for updates as the Raiders prepare to issue a statement later today.

Technology in baseball and the legacy of Steve Jobs

I should preface this post by saying I'm a pretty avid PC guy, but I'm also a Warriors fan, so that makes two inferior products I've had no problem supporting for the better part of the last two decades. That being said, the passing of technological visionary and Apple founder Steve Jobs has given people around the nation and around the world great pause. By the time the iPod hit the market back in 2001 it was clear that Steve Jobs' reach would extend far beyond Mac fanboys and their computers, and into a wide breadth of areas such as the realm of sports.

Baseball is one sport in particular that has embraced all that Apple has had to offer over the past few years. The advent of the iPad in early 2010 was every Sabermetrician's wet dream, allowing countless hours of viewing every player's  DIPS, VORP, and WAR till the cows come home (or ten hours of battery life, whichever happens first).

Jayson Stark of ESPN.com wrote a great piece at the end of August on how the information age is changing the way baseball is played, and of course Apple had a prominent role:

AN APPLE A DAY

In the beginning, there were tapes. Big, clunky VHS tapes that had to be loaded into bigger, clunkier VCRs. And that's how players watched video once upon a time.

Michael Zagaris/Getty Images 



Eventually, a few of the more advanced teams started editing those tapes to produce custom DVDs for a few technologically savvy players. And as the years rolled along, more and more players started lugging around laptops so they could crank up that video from airplane seats and hotel rooms.

Then came the iPod, an invention that made it possible for players to watch every episode of "Lost" and every pitch against the Blue Jays with just about the same ease. But the screens were smaller than Joe West's strike zone. And loading that video onto each iPod presented major, time-consuming technological challenges. So even the iPod had its limits.

So for years now, teams have been using video in some form or other. But it was just 16 months ago -- drum roll, please -- that life in the video room, as we used to know it, changed forever.

All because of the iPad.

So clearly the collapse of the 2011 Giants, and more specifically the anemic offense that couldn't hit their way out of a wet paper bag can be attributed to Steve Jobs and Apple. While opposing pitchers were watching video of every swing of every at-bat the Giants took, Aubrey Huff was playing Angry Birds.

If you're a hipster, then the Saints are dead to you

Y! sports via the AP is reporting that Mercedes Benz has purchased the naming rights for the Lousiana Superdome, home to the NFL's New Orleans Saints, and the source of frustration for countless fantasy football owners trying to figure out which Saints wideout will be Drew Brees' flavor of the week (please let it be Meachem).

Ernst Lieb, President and CEO of Mercedes-Benz USA, issued the following prepared statement in response to this blatant example of crass consumerism joyous occasion:

"The joining of the Mercedes-Benz brand with the world-class Saints organization and the Superdome, an iconic destination which has undergone an incredible transformation over the past six years, is a significant moment for us, the City of New Orleans, and the State of Louisiana."

The deal inked between the German auto giant and the 2009 Super Bowl champs leaves the NFL with just 9 stadiums (e.g. Lambeau Field) across the league yet to be pimped out for corporate sponsorships. Sadly, even THMG's beloved Bay Area teams aren't immune to such pandering, as evidenced by local venues such as the HP Pavilion (clever product placement in the name, except that HP no longer makes computers) and the Overstock.com Coliseum. I'm sorry Oakland, but you're doing it wrong by only getting $1.2 million out of the sponsorship, a sum that amounts to sofa cushion change to a company like Overstock.com.

MNF recap: The Colts die hard

The Colts, led by luscious locked QB and Hans Gruber associate Curtis Painter,

continued to surge ahead in the "suck for Luck" sweepstakes by falling to 0-4 in a 24-17 loss to the Bucs on Monday Night Football.

Painter, in his first career start managed to throw for 281 yds and 2 scores, and had this to say about his team's performance:

"It's always a little easier when you know you're going to get some playing time," Painter said. "We got off to a good start and put some points on the board. But obviously we have to find a way to put more points on the board and move the ball a little bit better."

Now if I were Painter I would have thanked (and possibly offered up my first born child to) Pierre Garçon for racking up both my TDs and half my passing yards on two short throws followed by monstrous YAC. Then again, if I were Painter I probably wouldn't sport the haircut of a 13 year old girl either, but hey that's just me.

Lost in this snore fest of a game that featured 20 penalties for 156 yds was that the comeback kid Josh Freeman led his Bucs to yet another 4th Quarter come from behind victory. Of course when you're playing the Colts, it's usually just a matter of when and not if the comeback is going to happen.